CNY 2013

It's the night before I return to work after a wonderful week long Chinese New Year break and my heart heaves with that familiar feeling of dread. After all the joy of being together with family, feasting endlessly on good food and wine and partying, it seemed that CNY just came and went so quickly. With all the "aliens" (country folk) gone back to their "planets" (home states), the Klang Valley was devoid of its usual hustle and bustle. In its place, peace and quiet gently settled upon the capital of Malaysia. Less people, less traffic, less noise. I did not need to breathe in the putrid smoke coming from the old chain-smoking dragon who lives next door, not did I need to listen to the terrible screeching of the violin from the tone-deaf neighbour behind. Even my strange dreams disappeared and I woke up each morning feeling well rested. If only this could continue for 365 days a year. Alas, all good things must come to an end as the city resumes its usual pace tomorrow and my strange dreams begin again.

The crocodile, the witch and the desert

Hooray! It's the start of a long weekend and I finally have some "me" time to catch up on new posts for my blog. I have been terribly exhausted at the end of each week that all I do on weekends is just sleep in to recuperate from the energy-draining analysis work that I do. I have never felt so fatigued in my life before in all my 5 years since I first joined the workforce. Perhaps old age has finally started to creep in. My youth will be diminished and dark circles will start appearing under my eyes. My hair will start to fall and a lobe of fat will appear around my waistline.

The only interesting bit in my life is that my dreams have been extremely random and vivid lately. I once dreamed that I had to cross a broken bridge over a swamp inhabited by a giant crocodile. In another, I was safe inside a wooden house with three witches waiting for me outside. On a separate occasion, I dreamed I was in Darwin (although I have never been to Darwin before!) watching a thunderstorm heading my way through a large glass window from the safety of a friend's house. In my dream, I pictured Darwin to be a barren desert inhabited by wargs (large, wolf-like creatures from Tolkien's Middle Earth). In each dream, I can feel my chest pounding from fear and anxiety, and it leaves me feeling exhausted each morning when I wake up to go to work.

Red and yellow and annoying repetitive songs

It's that time of the year again when all things red and loud get displayed and promoted prominently because... Chinese New Year is around the corner. With just 3 weeks to go, retailers are pushing hard to increase their turnover during this festive season. The Chinese community will be buying up fresh produce, seasonal food items and new clothes for the lunar new year. In Malaysia, there never seems to be a lack of an opportunity for a good sale. The Christmas/Year-end sales just ended 2 weeks ago. In my usual 'grinchy' attitude during this time of the year, I will be prudent and shun all things blaringly red and yellow, or anything associated with the season. The annoying repetitive festive music playing in the shopping mall will be treated as white noise whenever I come out for lunch break. In fact, if I had a choice, I'd rather shut myself up in a hole until CNY has gone. Peace and quiet will be plentiful and I do not need to answer to pesky relatives.

My living hell

We're almost reaching the middle mark of the month of January tomorrow and I haven't written anything since the new year began. For one, I just completed my first year end accounting close and have been working round the clock for 10 whole days including weekends. The last 2 weeks of my life in this new company has been nothing but a living hell. I have stayed back to work in the office until after 11pm and on one day stayed until 2am just to meet the ridiculously tight deadlines of the accounting close. Getting by with insufficient sleep, I can feel that my eyes have shrunken and I can see dark circles starting to appear under my eyes. Well, I heard it's all over now and it will not come back to haunt me until a year's time when year end accounting close comes again. That is, IF I am still here to face the torment again. But still, I feel like a part of me has been scarred, and that scar will never fully heal.

Happy New Year 2013 (I hope so...)

It has been a while since I last wrote a post. Work demands haven't been so accomodating lately to grant me the liberty of self expression and idling in cyberspace. I haven't exactly known happiness since I started working here. Apart from a decent paycheck and a healthy bank balance, I am extremely unhappy and worrisome. As of yesterday, I just passed my 3-month milestone. How much longer do I need to suffer? How much more can I take before crumbling? I have often pondered what death feels like. Every night when lying in bed, I wish that I would go into eternal slumber, never to wake up to the horror that lies before me each day at work. From my office, a climb over the metal railing of the balcony and a leap all the way down 16 floors to my death would seem like an easy end to all my problems. Except that I can't bring myself to do such things. I don't want the whole world to see my innards and brains splattered on the ground below. And I can't bear to think of those closest to me mourning my "unnatural" death. Suicide just feels extremely selfish. So what can I do about this mess that I am drowning in?

The Hobbit - An Unexpected Journey

I had meant to write this last weekend but I had too much on my mind to even write anything decent. I was fortunate enough to be one of the first to watch "The Hobbit - An Unexpected Journey" on its official release date last Thursday, and also fortunate enough to get a good seat in the cinema right in the centre, second row from the back. And boy was it a really long movie running for almost 3 hours! Straight after work at 6pm, I dashed downstairs for a quick early dinner and then sped off to the cinema at the other end of the mall to catch the 7pm show. I later regretted being early as the movie started 15 minutes late. Oh, confusticate and bebother the cinema's management!

In my opinion, the beginning scenes showing the plight of the dwarves and how Bilbo came to write his story were a bit too draggy, but once it got into the story proper, the pace hastened to a relatively comfortable speed and before you realised it, you get to see the Lonely Mountain from afar and it's the end of episode 1. I found the motley crew of dwarves amusing, but my favourite has got to be the scenes with the elves in it. The first was Thranduil riding an elk, looking so out-of-this-world with his queer body language and gestures. Next was Rivendell and the cavalry. Elrond still looks the same, but we get to see him riding a horse in battle gear this time. However, my most favourite scene of all time is that of the meeting of the White Council. I could just gaze at Galadriel and be enchanted by her ethereal beauty all day long. Another scene worth mentioning is that of Radagast exploring Dol Guldur and confronting a wraith summoned from the dead by the Necromancer. That scene gives me the chills.

However, in line with the movie adaptation of The Lord of the Rings, there are several aspects of the movie which did not follow the book, perhaps due to time constraints and for cinematic purposes. For example, no where in the book is it mentioned that the White Council meets, or that Radagast enters Dol Guldur before Gandalf, but it can be implied from The Silmarillion. Music wise, I felt that there were too many repetitive themes from The Lord of the Rings, such as The Shire, The Finding of the Ring and Rivendell, but perhaps it was to serve as a memory refresher after all these long years. Criticisms aside, I felt it was a great start to the trilogy with excellent portrayal of the characters, and stunning cinematography and special effects. I honestly can hardly wait for the next instalment of "The Hobbit - The Desolation of Smaug" due on 13 December 2013, if I survive Doomsday 2012.

The Hobbit

 With all the hype going on concerning the upcoming release of the movie "The Hobbit - There and Back Again" next week, I decided to get myself the book by J.R.R. Tolkien. Oh, and it came with a free gift too - a Gandalf minifigure. I was a bit hesitant at first after my failed attempt at reading "The Lord of the Rings" 10 years ago, but after reading the first few pages, I felt comfortable enough. And so, I took the book with me everynight before going to bed, all snuggled up under my quilt, reading 1 to 2 chapters a night, speeding up on weekends. Alas, I completed the adventures of Bilbo this very afternoon and will need to look for a new adventure to begin. Or I might just very well read it a second time to remember the story better.